RENO, NV
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| "You want my job? Take it ----!You think you do, Until you see what this world is really about. It's not pretty, Man! It's not ---- pretty, or nice or special. There is no God and I can prove it," Mr. Henry T. Marksman, Fly On The Wall, yelled at passers-by, gawking as the fly was escorted out of the court room, early Monday morning. |
Monday morning, Henry T. Marksman announced his Antliophora Committee retirement. His claim was that the associated stresses of his position were causing physical and mental duress. Mr. Marksman’s resignation is following suit in a recent trend of houseflies stepping down from the highly coveted position, causing concerns to rise amongst the fly community in regard to the working conditions and overall state of humanity.
Although no public statement has been made on behalf of the Antliophora Committee, the group responsible for monitoring and regulating the Anthomyiid [House Flies] involvement and relationship with the non-fly sector of the population, ANNT’s Chief of “Insecta” Communications Director, Darien Clark, was able to get obtain a short interview with ex-committee member Marksman.
When asked to cite his earlier statement from this morning in regard to the specific “stresses” mentioned, Mr. Marksman articulated at length on the certain unforeseeable depths that humanity has found itself. “Witnessing the absolute floor-level of society has sent me, mentally, to places no one should ever find themselves; ever…. I mean, have you ever seen forced cannibalism… I didn’t think so. You can tell when someone has seen something like that.”
Sources close to Mr. Marksman, however, believe that his recent abdication may be part of a long staged legal battle the Ex-Committee Head has faced since the ruling of a Good Samaritan Lawsuit filed against the fly in early December of 2007. Public Records indicate that Mr. Marksman was accused guilty of witnessing not only first-degree murder, but also extortion, conspiracy, assault and illegal music downloading. Mr. Marksman’s defense attorney dictated that, at the time of the alleged incidents, his client tried “frantically” to find an open window, from which to escape to inform the authorities. When Mr. Marksman was unable to initially find an open window, he tried again at the first window, in hopes of a different outcome. Failing that, he then tried the kitchen window again, “just in case.”
Henry Marksman declined any comment in regard to the 2007 ruling, in our initial interview, citing the question as “irrelevant to anything that has ever mattered in the history of the world.”
Although no public statement has been made on behalf of the Antliophora Committee, the group responsible for monitoring and regulating the Anthomyiid [House Flies] involvement and relationship with the non-fly sector of the population, ANNT’s Chief of “Insecta” Communications Director, Darien Clark, was able to get obtain a short interview with ex-committee member Marksman.
When asked to cite his earlier statement from this morning in regard to the specific “stresses” mentioned, Mr. Marksman articulated at length on the certain unforeseeable depths that humanity has found itself. “Witnessing the absolute floor-level of society has sent me, mentally, to places no one should ever find themselves; ever…. I mean, have you ever seen forced cannibalism… I didn’t think so. You can tell when someone has seen something like that.”
Sources close to Mr. Marksman, however, believe that his recent abdication may be part of a long staged legal battle the Ex-Committee Head has faced since the ruling of a Good Samaritan Lawsuit filed against the fly in early December of 2007. Public Records indicate that Mr. Marksman was accused guilty of witnessing not only first-degree murder, but also extortion, conspiracy, assault and illegal music downloading. Mr. Marksman’s defense attorney dictated that, at the time of the alleged incidents, his client tried “frantically” to find an open window, from which to escape to inform the authorities. When Mr. Marksman was unable to initially find an open window, he tried again at the first window, in hopes of a different outcome. Failing that, he then tried the kitchen window again, “just in case.”
Henry Marksman declined any comment in regard to the 2007 ruling, in our initial interview, citing the question as “irrelevant to anything that has ever mattered in the history of the world.”
Such hard-hitting journalism. Bravo.
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